NLP Patterns & How To Use Them

Problem solving is key to success.  The question then, is what strategies (which are in fact NLP Patterns) for solving problems quickly and effectively do you use?  Indeed, are you even aware of them?  Do you solve problems faster and more effectively than others so that you can excel in your business and personal life, or do you wish that you were more effective in this area?

As a child growing up with parents who were ‘hippies’ I was subject to some pretty bizarre experiences.  To be honest, living in a dysfunctional family I grew up with a lot of problems.

I eventually came to realise that most people have some kind of ‘history’.  Sadly most just survive in life rather than thrive.  Most never discover a truly effective and holistic problem solving model that they can really rely on; one that consistently meets their individual needs (for example to resolve past issues or limiting beliefs) and one that can also be used for creating success in life and business.

But the truth is that if you want to understand how to call life and business on your terms, you need a reliable system for solving personal and business problems consistently.  This is where NLP Patterns come in.

There are ‘secrets’ to success (NLP Patterns) – ways to achieve what you want in much shorter time periods.  Of course, one way to find them is to study someone who is already achieving what you want.

Success Leave Clues – and that’s where ‘NLP Patterns’ come into a life of their own…

Just as slow moving estuaries are connected to faster flowing rivers, you must be connected to others who are ‘flowing’ and getting the results you want, so that you can accelerate your success.  You can copy or model their patterns and habits of success – their NLP Patterns.

In his book ‘The 4 Hour Work Week’, Timothy Ferris talks about working only 4 hours a week so that you can travel and do the things you really want to do. While I’ve personally been very fortunate to be able to do just that over the last five years, I’ve discovered that what is missing for most people in ‘The 4 Hour Work Week’ is that they’ve never learned to use and integrate a dynamic and holistic problem solving system – one that creates rapid solutions to complex problems and also frees up time to experience the kind of adventures they really want to in life.

How is it that some people like Stephanie can double her business in just 12 months?  And yet others struggle to get through their to do list every day?  It is in large part due to the patterns of thinking and physiology that determine our experience of life.

For me, being able to travel and live anywhere I want is one of my core values. I decided over 10 years ago to invest in myself first.  I now have a system, based on NLP Patterns – or ‘Success Secrets’ for want of a better word – that allows me to travel and live exactly where I want – currently in Ibiza  This means having a system that enables me to solve problems faster and more effectively than most people.  With a better problem solving system, it’s been much easier for me to call and design life on my terms, just like I helped Stephanie to…

So you need a better model that allows you to make fast and sustainable change.  You need a better system for engaging your mind, memory and emotional IQ in a way that solves problems fast.

How To Use NLP Patterns:

Below you’ll find a list of some key NLP Patterns, or Filters.  Take a couple of minutes now to identify which of these ‘Filters’ or ‘NLP Patterns’ are your preference.  Then explore what the implications of those largely unconscious choices are on your life.  And what would be different if you were to consciously choose other filters in stead; what would the implications be for you and others?

Now that you have identified your own preferences and the implications of continuing to use those preferences or change them, you can learn to develop more influence over yourself and others by paying attention to these in your daily life.  A great way to learn how to do this is to choose one set of filters each day and focus on spotting them in conversation.  You can then experiment with yourself and others by asking questions that elicit the opposite filter/ NLP Pattern.  Notice what a difference it makes to your and others experience of life by changing the experience of life in this way.

If you are interested in finding out more about NLP Patterns and how they can help you call life and business on your terms once and for all, join a FREE webinar here where you will discover ‘How To Solve Any Problem In 28 Words Or Less’.

Bring your questions, challenges and outcomes to explore on the Webinar and discover how NLP Patterns will change your life forever!

It’s funny what one word can do to change our state or shock us right?

Just one word…. for example the F word!

Watch this Sixty Second Snippet now and find out how you can have more choice, freedom and possibility in your life….

So we create our state by what we say to ourselves and the images or movies we play in our mind.  That’s it.  It’s as simple as that.  Change your thoughts you change your reality right?

Well it’s not really as simple as that is it?

Because, what’s really running the show for most of us, most of the time, is our unconscious.  We are talking to ourselves throughout the day and imagining scenarios based on our patterned and conditioned way of perceiving the world that sabotage our success and sense of fulfilment.

In the field of NLP, the term known as a ‘not knowing state’ is one where you empty your mind of inner noise, pictures or movies – in other words patterned ways of thinking – and in stead open up to new ideas, information, possibilities and intuitions.  It’s about embracing a state of not knowing, what the Buddha might call equanimity and emptiness.  And from that openness comes freedom.

So just for today, or the next hour, or the next minute consciously decide to not label, to not know and to become open and aware in stead.  Sitting in the seat of consciousness without judgement or fear will give you immense freedom…. right now!

Until next time, live fearlessly!

A while back I signed up for a business coaching and mentoring programme.

Success without fulfilment is failure!

I’m a massive fan of coaching and mentoring as they show shortcuts to success… normally!

And I was very excited, having already achieved a certain level of success in my life and business to be taking things to the next level.

On the face of it (the marketing of it) the course I was on ticked ALL the boxes. As they normally do. I’ve signed up to various other courses in the past such as stock market investing, options courses, millionaire mind events, property investment courses, Internet Marketing programs, NLP – you name it…. and have had the same experience as most people. A sales pitch into higher and higher programmes which make the people who run them rich but do very little to REALLY help me get to where I want let alone rich. Luckily there are some exceptions.  There is also an important ambiguity which I will explore another time… what does being ‘rich’ actually mean?

Anyway, when I signed up to this business and coaching mentoring programme I was truly excited. The marketing message was perfect for me… they understood the challenges I was having, they had the right solution, I even had a couple of consultations before joining and the person really listened, cared and understood where I was coming from.  But… Read more…

Accelerated NLP Training – what is the barrier to you creating something amazing in your life – right now?

NLP Modelling – “Be The Change You Want To See In The World” Mahatma Gandhi

I don’t know a single person in the world with whom these words have not rung true.

I believe that the theme, the essence of these words – Be The Change – are more important and relevant right now than ever before.  In these times of incredible change in technology and human consciousness; in the way we do business; in the way we are called to show up in the World, we all have the capacity to be the change we want to see in this amazing World.

Its been some time since I’ve communicated with many of you, and there is good reason.  I personally have been through massive change in the last 6 months, having come back from a long hot winter in India.

Locals kids hitching a ride in Kerala

As most of you know I’ve taken the last couple of years off travelling, living in Ibiza and India, running workshops and developing my new venture – giving people the skills, experiences and models to literally Be, Do & Have Anything.

Really, the outcome of my ‘work’ is in marrying two apparently disparate concepts – Financial and Emotional Freedom. Success and Fulfillment.  Money and Happiness.

They seem to be very illusive for many people.  Often people make good money, but are not really happy.  And often they are happy and fulfilled, but do not have material wealth.

The question I have been asking for the last decade is, how can we have both?  How can we marry financial freedom – the ability to do what we want, where we want, when we want – WHILE also being truly and sustainably happy? Read more…

What an incredibly unique and beautiful way to start the day. It’s shortly before 5am, pitch black and I am sitting cross legged overlooking the invisibly black sea below doing yoga, pranayama and meditating.  I don’t think I have ever started a day in such a uniquely relaxing, beautiful and connecting way.  And this is only on day 1 of being in the Ashram.

Already I am looking forwards to starting my day like this tomorrow.  We wake up at 4:30 and by 5am we’re doing yoga and drifting in and out of consciousness as we relax while meditating.  Then a cup of chai around 8:30am, and as I start to connect with the ‘reality’ of the day I begin thinking – most people are getting into work  – and here we are beginning our day in a state of meditation and connection.  And that reminds me of what Rata Krishnan said today, ‘work is like a healthy meditation’… how different that perception of work is here from the UK… they love what they do here!

Watching the sun rise slowly far in the distance, hanging over the backwaters and coconut palms, with the sea crashing against the deserted sandy beach I realise that it’s not just the yoga that induces relaxation and joy, it’s also this most beautiful and rich environment conducive to connecting with nature and all that is around.

View of the Arabian Sea from the Ashram

I’ve been doing yoga on the beach for the last few weeks.  I am amazed at the flexibility I have developed in that short period of time.  I can easily touch my toes and in fact hold my feet while stretching my hamstrings.  It’s wonderful to be in the Ashram.  Some of you may be conjuring up images of a beautiful and spiritual home lined with plants and tranquil water features… but the Ashram does not portray that kind of beauty.

It is one of the most basic and indeed cluttered environments I have lived in… everything is put to use here or stored haphazardly here and there, waiting for another day.  My mattress is just thick enough to allow for sleep and there is no sink, just an open shower and toilette.   It’s dirty.  But it’s home and it holds no secrets.  It’s open, honest and real.  Perhaps that’s all we want to be.  Swamiji is a great believer on cleaning the inside rather than the outside.  Hence yoga, meditation and proper food are good for cleaning the spirit and soul. Read more…

Why would anyone want to learn NLP?

I’ve just ambled lazily back across the pristine white sand of a deserted beach in Cherai having been swimming alone in the Arabian sea – a beautiful luke warm bath with surfable waves apparently induced by the solar eclipse.  Being back in India is like coming home!

The Kerala Backwaters... kissing the Arabian Sea

Having grown up until the age of 7 with with my parents who were hippies, and having lived in more houses that I have lived years its pretty much indisputable that I’m a born nomad.  And I normally feel very much at home wherever I am.  I have been living in Ibiza since last summer which I consider to be my spiritual home, despite the reputation it has among many in Britain!  But India feels as much a home if not more than anywhere else, and coming back here this year for a couple of months reminds me of how utterly special and unique this country is and how I want to keep coming back here each year – to this most rich, vibrant, beautifully alive and special place.

Today, the day of the solar eclipse, is a special day.  Not just because of the eclipse but because I have committed to recognising and changing a pattern of mine which I know will have a profound impact on my life, and perhaps more importantly the lives of others around me.

As you learn NLP you’ll discover what’s known as meta-programmes, or filters.  These are how we filter information coming through our senses and make sense of the world.  Well, today I have added a new one today, an important distinction for me, and that is the notion of ‘input’ versus ‘output’.  I love learning, in fact I am addicted to learning.  A much better addiction than some things, but nonetheless an addiction.  I love input, I love learning, I love to learn NLP; I love finding out what others do, say and think and modelling their success.  But today I believe its time that I reverse this pattern and now ‘output’ more than I ‘input’.

So my new blog and websites are being built and I am in the process of designing products and workshops to give others this rich, peripatetic, vibrant and fun life that I am so privileged to have, or whatever it is that they truly want!

Riding along the dusty roads today on my Enflield Bullet, the thud thud thud of the 350cc single cylinder engine attracting attention as if it were a pink tractor I realised just how lucky I am to have designed my life this way and I know have the desire to give others the gifts and leanings I have had along my journey.

One of many rides I gave to locals kids on my Enfleld Bullet

Its paradoxical in some respects that I am entirely responsible for creating my life in this way and yet at the same time there are unseen forces in the Universe that have helped conspire towards me following this path, to open up to and awaken to all the magical coincidences and synchronicities around me…. around us all!

And so riding along on my Enflied thinking about all this today, I became very grateful and excited. I also became aware of how I can tend to overcomplicated life.  Life can be very simple.  I know that from watching how simply people live out here.

The other day I asked Sajeen, an amazing and young yoga teacher in Cherai, “is life good”? to which he smiled and replied “of course” as if it could not be any other way and my question was absurd.  Now, that is simplicity, finding love and joy in everything because you choose to!

It’s funny that somehow in the so-called civilised West many of us have come to believe, or been conditioned through advertising and cultural norms – that if I get x I will feel y.  Whereas in fact we can feel any way we want whenever we want.  And then enjoy the journey as well as the destination!  Perhaps that is the secret, but of course knowing something and doing it are two very different things.

I heard Gary Vaynerchuck say earlier today “love what you do and if you don’t then STOP.  There is absolutely no need to be not enjoying yourself in this day and age.”

And I concur.  There is more technology, money, opportunity, information and wealth than at any other time in the history of humankind.  If you are pursuing making money or a 9-5 and you’re not enjoying it, then you are doing yourself and humanity a disservice and going after success rather than fulfilment.  And that to me is failure.

There are so many people with apparently so little who manage to be happy…. who manage to just be, and be happy, and I believe we can all learn the distinctions which enable them to live in that place.  For me one of those distinctions is a commitment to daily practice every morning, which at the moment is yoga.  As I sit on the beach now writing this blog, I am looking one way and then the other as far as I can see and there is not a soul… not a single solitary soul.  I could be lonely but I am not.  Because deep inside I am connecting to a place of love, joy and inspiration and that is open to all of us at any moment in time. And I’m outputting

And it is in that connecting, that desire to connect into the bigger system, to output rather than input, that I believe is one of our greatest sources of sustainable joy.  That is where we find happiness.  The question then is, what do we need to focus on, to believe in and do in order to be in that place of joy?  What do you need to focus on now?  Do you want to learn NLP to really accelerate your success?  Just remember, that success without fulfilment is failure.

Looking above me watching the eagles circling in the dense heat of the Indian sky, with nature all around blending seamlessly into an enticing array of colours, cows, cats, cockerels, ducks and dogs, I feel humbled as I reminisce on the rich and varied day I have had.  I am humbled by the smiles of nearly every person I passed earlier today on my motorbike; by the simplicity and pace of life; by the acceptance that all is as its meant to be.  As I recall – the three smiling middle aged ladies in vibrant buttercup-yellow dresses, the pink and orange houses that I passed and the cows grazing peacefully by the side of the road – I am reminded that happiness is all we want.  Happiness is all we truly want.  And that is success.  And that is why I decided to learn NLP…. to discover how I could be both happy and successful.

Go follow your bliss!
With love
Tristan

If you want to learn NLP feel free to enquire about my distance learning programme, or continue browsing the site.

NLP Anchoring & Managing Your State

About 3 months ago I went to a friend’s house to deliver some coaching and have a joint heart-storming session.  Having taken Tracey through a load of coaching, it was my turn…. and what happened just as she was about to help me with some marketing stuff… well we had a cup of tea and I managed to spill mine ALL over my nice new Dell Notebook…Wooooooohhh… state management… “oh it’s ok, it’s cool… chill…. it will all work out, life rocks

NLP Anchoring Step 1

Identify a resourceful state that you would like to experience when you want, one that you have experienced before. For example, this could be a state of confidence, motivation or enthusiasm.

NLP Anchoring Step 2

Wait until the next time you have this state.  Be aware of what it’s like to be in this state: what are you seeing, hearing, feeling and saying to yourself?

NLP Anchoring Step 3

What is the trigger for the state? In other words, what set you on a sequence of getting to this state?

NLP Anchoring Step 4

What happened next? What did you see, hear, feel and say to yourself? You might ask yourself the question – “what am I doing in my thinking” each time you experience the state to unpack more of your strategy.  Asking the question ‘what happens just before that’ or what happens just after that’ will help you to understand the sequence you go through naturally to achieve this state.

NLP Anchoring Step 5

Write down the sequence of thinking patterns so that you can check it out next time you experience it.

NLP Anchoring Step 6

Test to find out if you can create the state without the usual trigger.  If you can create the state without the usual trigger (which you can) you’ll have access to that state any time you want.

An even longer story short (4 failed collect and return appointments, not being able to fix it, no reply to emails etc etc) I ended up splashing out on a Mac Air and…

My Office

It has been the most amazing life transforming awakening and empowering experience in my life and has enabled me to work, play and live life even more in the way that I want… PC’s are from the last millennium

So THANK GOD for losing things, breaking things and things not going the way we want  It allows us to let go and grow.  And thank God for being able to manage my state through anchoring techniques.

Here’s to a truly wonderful weekend all…

Lots of love and remember that there is no road to happiness, happiness is the road!

Tristan

For more on NLP Anchoring or managing your state for public speaking and other contexts join a free webinar by clicking “Sign Me Up” on the right…. or you can go here and sign up for a free 1on1 Business Breakthrough Coaching session.

A Soft And Personal Take On NLP Training

I woke this morning to the most magical sunrise. It fact it was not the sunrise itself that was so magical but the clouds, in the way that they reflected and dispersed hues of orange, yellow and red stretching into silver lined clouds beyond.  And seeing them melting into the infinite blue sky beyond that really struck me.

It’s incredibly inspiring looking outside myself and being absorbed into nature and the world around rather than being absorbed in my own thinking; my own needs and desires.  I think it’s called being fully associated, or really in the moment!

And this morning I did that as I went for a run.  It was a truly magical, connecting and enthralling experience. I found myself running through deserted woodland, with the dew rising slowly and effortlessly from the green foliage around.  I’m feeling soft branches and leaves brushing my skin and the intense heat of the sun my forehead.  And I notice I am thinking of nothing and feeling everything.  And then as I become aware of the droplets of sweat beginning to fall from my forehead I notice myself saying ‘this really is beautiful’!  A big grin spreads across my face.

This I believe, is what life is about – experiencing the depths of our emotions, experiencing the here and now and perhaps more than anything, experiencing energy.

A couple of apparently profound thoughts came to me today while running and later sitting on the beach.  And one of those was about this concept of energy or flow.

I remember thinking to myself a long time ago about ‘flow’.  A  state of flow was something I really aspired to experience on a regular basis, in fact all the time. I became consciously aware of creating a state of flow myself and noticing when I was not in that state so that I could adjust my thinking, physiology and language patterns in order that I could get back into flow.

I think it is this, our ability to manage our state, change state and create a state that is really the difference that makes a difference in our experience of life, in our ability to be happy and to be, do and have anything we really want.

The only reason we do anything is for a feeling…

As humans we are emotion, or feeling driven creatures. We do things to gain pleasure and avoid pain, and often both are motivating factors at the same time.

There are three ways primary ways we create emotions.

NLP Training Tip 1 – Focus Creates Our Reality

Firstly, we create emotion by what we focus on. So if you focus on something you want to have in your life you will have one emotional reaction, and if you focus on something you don’t want you have a different emotional reaction. Focus, whether thinking internally in our minds or looking outside of ourselves creates emotion or feelings.

NLP Training Tip 2 – Wisdom Is In The Body

Physiologically, or moving our body also creates emotion… if you slouch now in your chair and don’t move you create one emotion. And now as you sit up and smile and take a deep breath you will create another emotion. We really can profoundly affect our experience in the here and now simply by moving out body.  Motion creates emotion!  And remember, knowledge is only rumour until it’s in the muscle.

NLP Training Tip 3 – The Limits Of Your Language Are The Limits Of Your Life

And finally our language, the words that we say to ourselves, also creates emotion.  Just think of the difference in your experience if you say to yourself “I feel fine”, “I’m not bad” or “I feel great”.  Every.  Word. Counts.

These are the three core components that I have discovered from my my NLP Training that create the emotions we feel on a day-to-day basis, and indeed from moment to moment.  Language, physiology and focus.

How are you creating energy?

And in mastering and modelling the difference makes the difference in creating different states that you want in your life, you can become master of your emotions.

So what’s the point in NLP Training and how can it help us master love, life and our Universe? Well…

“What we see and hear is what we think about what we think about is what we feel. What we feel influences reactions. Reactions become habits and is habits that determine our destiny.” Bob Grass

Thus, as we begin to pay attention to what we see and hear and learn to not only take action on those things that inspire us, but also unpack and release the fears and limiting beliefs that hold us back, our whole world opens up.  Suddenly choice, possibility and love exist where before there were barriers, impossibility and fear.

So I wonder what it is you will be paying attention to today?  And I also wonder how you will be using your inherent ability to change the way you are using your body, your language and your focus of attention to create new experiences and the states that you want to experience moment by moment….

And if you are interested to know more about NLP Training feel free to get in touch or join a free webinar sometime.

NLP Courses To Change Your Life & Business